A minister had just finished an excellent fried chicken dinner at the home of a congregation member when he saw a rooster come strutting through the yard.

"That's certainly a proud-looking rooster," the minister commented.

"Yes, sir," replied the farmer. "He has reason to be proud-- one of his sons just entered the ministry."

Two morons stand on a cliff with their arms outstretched. One has some budgies lined up on each arm, the other has parrots lined up on his arms.

After a couple of minutes, they both leap off the cliff and fall to the ground.

Lying next to each other in intensive care at the hospital, one moron says to the other, "I don't think much of this budgie jumping."

The other moron replies, "Yeah, I'm not too keen on this paragliding either."

My wife and I were at my high school reunion. As I looked around, I noticed the other men in their expensive suits ... and their bulging stomachs.

Proud of the fact that I weighed just five pounds more than I did when I was in high school, I said to my wife, "I'm the only guy here who can still wear the suit he wore when he graduated."

She glanced at the well-dressed crowd, then back at me, and said, "You're the only one who has to."