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merk

User Details

Member Since : Nov, 2015
# of jokes posted : 2681
# of followers : 5
# of following: 2
Location: United States
won: $ 2512.00
$15.00 won 4 votes

While carpenters were working outside the old house I had just bought, I busied myself with indoor cleaning. I had just finished washing the floor when one of the workmen asked to use the bathroom.

With dismay I looked from his muddy boots to my newly scrubbed floors. "Just a minute," I said, thinking of a quick solution. "I'll put down newspapers."

"That's all right, lady," he responded. "I'm already trained."

4 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "merk" |
3 votes

A jeweler called the police station to report a robbery.

"You'll never believe what happened, Sergeant. A truck backed up to my store, the doors opened and an elephant came out. He broke my plate glass window, stuck his trunk in, sucked up all the jewelry, and climbed back into the truck. The doors closed and the truck pulled away."

The desk sergeant said, "Could you tell me, for identification purposes, whether it was an Indian elephant or an African elephant?"

"What's the difference?" asked the jeweler.

"Well," said the sergeant, an African elephant has great big ears and an Indian elephant has little ears."

"Come to think of it, I couldn't see his ears," said the jeweler. "He had a stocking over his head."

3 votes

CATEGORY Police Jokes
posted by "merk" |
2 votes

After picking up food for his daughter's cat, George spied a new bowl for the pet and grabbed it too.

"Shall I have the cat's name written on the side of the bowl?" offered the store owner.

"No, don't bother," replied George. "He can't read anyway."

2 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
posted by "merk" |
$25.00 won 4 votes

A Sunday school teacher asked her class, "What was Jesus' Mother's name?"

One child answered, "Mary."

The teacher then asked, "Who knows what Jesus' Father's name was?"

Another child said, "The Verge."

Confused, the teacher asked, "Where did you get that?"

The little one said, "Well, you know they are always talking about The Verge n' Mary."

4 votes

posted by "merk" |