If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why couldn't he fix a hole in a boat?

And...

Why did Ginger and Mary Ann have tons of clothes with them when they were supposed to be on a "three hour tour?"

"Did you know Job spoke when he was a very small baby?"

"Where does it say that?"

"It says, 'Job cursed the day he was born.'"

My brother was sort of odd. I remember once on his birthday he fell down a dry well, so we lowered his birthday cake to him.

He didn't even tug on the rope to say thanks.

Little boy to a departing relative... "There's no hurry, Auntie. Daddy put the clock a whole hour ahead."