One night a priest who is driving erratically gets pulled over by a cop. The cop asks him if he's been drinking. The priest says he's been drinking water all night. The cop sees a bottle of wine in the passenger seat and tells the priest what he sees.

The priest then nonchalantly says to the cop, "Jesus has done it again!"

A little boy opened the big family Bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the old Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed between the pages. “Mama, look what I found," the boy called out. "What have you got there, dear?" With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear!"

When Jesus went to the bathroom for the first time as a baby, that was the first time someone said the phrase: “Holy Crap!”

Q: What has four wheels and flies?

A: A garbage truck.