A Sunday school teacher said to her children, "We have been learning how powerful kings and queens were in Bible times. But, there is a higher power. Can anybody tell me what it is?"

One child blurted out, "Aces!"

Teacher: Joey, how do you spell 'crocodile'?
Joey: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'
Teacher: No, that's wrong.
Joey: Maybe it is wrong, but you did ask me how I spelled it."

Reporter interviewing a 105-year-old lady....

"What is the best thing about being 105?" the reporter asked.

The old lady replied, "No peer pressure."

No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.