I know. I know. People say, "It's the thought that counts, not the gift."

But couldn't people learn to think a bit bigger?!?!

The Sunday School teacher looked at the little boy's drawing of the manger scene. A large dog was among the animals.

The teacher looked puzzled.

"Oh," said the child, "That's a German Shepherd."

Another man and I share a locker at work. Noticing that it needed a new combination lock, my partner said he would pick one up on his way to work the next day. It occurred to me later that I might not see him in the morning. How would I find out the combination?

I needn't have worried.

When I arrived at work I found that he had used the locker before me and had left a note reading: "To find the first number subtract 142 from your high score the last time we went bowling. The second number is 16 less than that. To find the third number subtract 1.87 from the amount you owe me."

A little girl is in the kitchen watching her mother prepare for the following day's Christmas dinner.

She asks, "Mommy, can I please have a cat for Christmas?"

Her mommy replies, "No honey, you'll have turkey just like the rest of us."