Wife to husband: “Did you like supper?”

Trying to be polite, the husband says, “Yes.”

The wife says, “I was just wondering, because when I gave some to the cats they tried to bury it.”

When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it...

If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant!

I was checking out at the busy super market, and the cashier was having problems. The register ran out of paper, the scanner malfunctioned, and finally the cashier spilled a handful of coins. When she totaled my order, it came to exactly $22.

Trying to soothe her nerves, I said, "That's a nice round figure."

Still frazzled, she glared at me and said, "You're no bean pole yourself."

I am the youngest of three...

Both my parents are older.