A robbery took place in Milwaukee. A witness was being interviewed by a policeman. The policeman asked the man if he had lived in Milwaukee all his life.

The man replied, "No, not yet."

What musical note do you hear when you drop a piano down a mine shaft?

A flat minor!

A man said to his doctor, "Doc, please don't ever give me artificial respiration!"

"Why not?" the Doctor asked.

The man replied, "If you can't give me the real thing, FORGET IT!"

A drunk stumbled out the door of the bar. He stood on the corner waiting for the light. He wife calls and asks if he is drunk. The man replies, "Of course not!"

Being suspicious that he is drunk, she says, "Okay then, tell me where you are and I will come and get you."

The drunk replies, "I am at the corner of WALK and DON'T WALK!"