Two DIZZY type ladies were discussing the big hole in a street as every day somebody fall in it...

Dizzy A : We must find a solution cause every day some one is dead and the nearest hospital 20 Km.

Dizzy B : I got it, we build a new hospital beside the hole.

Dizzy A : It will take 5 - 10 years to build a hospital. After that everybody will be dead. I got a great solution... we close that hole and open another one beside the nearest hospital!

Three NFL fans of a losing team were drowning their sorrows at a sports bar after the team lost yet again. The first fan said, "I blame the coach. If he developed better plays, we'd be a great team."

The second fan nodded and replied, "I blame the players. They just don't try hard enough."

The third fan thought for a moment and then said, "I blame my mom and dad. If I'd been born in Boston, I'd be supporting a better team."

The golfer sliced a ball into a field of chickens, striking one of the hens and killing it instantly. He was understandably upset, and sought out the farmer.

“I’m sorry,” he said, “my terrible tee-shot hit one of your hens and killed it. Can I replace the hen?”

“I don’t know about that,” replied the farmer, mulling it over. “How many eggs a day do you lay?”

Little Johnny's school cook prided herself on the healthy meals she provided with lots of vegetables and fruits.

One day when the power failed, the cook couldn't serve a hot meal in the cafeteria, so at the last minute she whipped up great stacks of peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwiches.

Upon filling up his plate, Little Johnny's comment was, "Finally, a home-cooked meal!"