Recently I experienced muscle pain after installing a sound-deadening device on my car's exhaust system...

The doctor diagnosed it as a case of muffler cramps.

An important and very well publicized murder trial was soon to begin. In preparation for the trial, the tiresome jury selection process took place, each side hotly contesting and dismissing potential jurors.

One prospective juror, Dan O'Keefe, was called for his question session.

He was asked, "Property holder?"

Dan replied, "Yes, I am, Your Honor."

Then he was asked, "Married or single?"

Dan responded, "Married for twenty years, Your Honor."

Then the judge asked, "Formed or expressed an opinion?"

Dan stated with certainty, "Not in twenty years, Your Honor."

If con is the opposite of pro...

Does that mean Congress is the opposite of progress?

Have you ever wondered...

Why they don't make an airplane out of the same stuff they make the indestructible black box?