The minister, meeting a neighbor's son after church, noticed he had a black eye. He put his hand on the boys head and says, "My boy, I pray you may never fight again. And that you will never get a black eye again."
"Thank you," the boy answered. "You may want to go home and pray for your own son too, I just gave him two of them."
The traveling salesman was passing through a small western town selling an elixir which he declared: "will make men live to a great age!"
"Look at me," he shouted. "Hale and hearty, I'm over 300 years old."
"Is he really as old as that?" a bystander ask the youthful assistant.
"I can't say," replied the assistant. "I've only worked for him for just over a 100 years."
The son has finally saved enough money to buy his own house. It is just a few houses down the road from where his parents still live.
On the day he moves in he invites some friends over, turns On the music and drinking a few beers. As the son was making his toast and said, "I don't have to listen to my parents anymore", the phone rings. He goes inside to answer and is silent when he rejoins the party.
"Who was that?" ask one of the guests.
"Well," replied the son. "It was my father telling me to turn down the music as there are people in the neighborhood that are trying to sleep."
Bob sent Alice the following email: "Dear Alice, I must be getting so forgetful. I proposed to you last night , but have forgotten whether you said yes or no."
Alice replied: "Dear Bob. It is so good to hear from you. I know I said no to someone last night, but I had forgotten just who it was."