If I had $1 every time someone over 40 told me my generation was the problem...

Then I could afford a house in the economy they ruined!

"We have your son," said the kidnapper.

"I don't have a son," says the woman.

"Then who just asked for warm milk and made us cut the crust off his sandwiches?"

"Oh God, you have my husband."

Dad: "What are you drinking, son?"

Son: "Soy milk."

Dad: "Hola milk, ¡soy padre!"