A driving instructor: What would you do if you were going up an icy hill and the motor stalled and brakes failed?
His student replied; I’d quickly adjust the rearview mirror.

Did you hear about the rock’n’roll singer who wore a hearing aid for four years?
Then he found out he only needed a haircut.

A guy to a friend: “After three sets golf clubs and ten years of lessons, I am finally getting some fun out of golf. I quit.”

A guy coming out of the gym tells his friend, “I just lost 10 pounds!”

His friend says, “Turn around, I think I found them!”