A little Henry sits at the dinner table, reaches into his plate, picks up a chicken leg, and starts to eat. His mother says, "Henry did you wash your hands?" Henry replies, "No! I don’t want my chicken to taste like soap mom!

Edward Hale, while chaplain of the U.S. Senate, was asked, "Do you pray for the senators?"

He quickly replied, "No. After getting to know the senators, I pray for the people."

A man went to the airline counter.

The ticket agent asked, "Sir, do you have any reservations?"

He replied, "Reservations? Of course I have reservations, but I'm flying anyway!"

Did you hear what happened to the optometrist?

He fell into his lens grinder and made a spectacle of himself.