A man had just presented his wife with the fox coat she had been coaxing and cajoling him to by her for weeks. Now he was perplexed to see her examining it with a sad look.
“What’s the matter, sweetheart? Don’t you like the coat?” he asked.
“I love it,” she answered. “It’s just that I was feeling sorry for the poor little creature who was skinned alive so that I could have the pleasure of wearing this coat.”
“Why, thank you,” said the husband.

A college professor walked into a bas and said, “Bring me a martinus.”
The bartender smiled and said, “You mean martini?”
“If I want more than one,” snapped the professor, “I’ll order them”

A woman sat down on a park bench, glanced around and decided to stretch out her legs on the seat and relax. After a while, a beggar came up to her and said, "Hello, luv, how's about us going for a walk together?"
"How dare you," retorted the woman, "I'm not one of your cheap pickups!"
Well then," said the tramp, "what are you doing in my bed?"

Teacher to a student: "Can you think of a solution to end unemployment?"
"Yes, sir! I'd put all the men on one island and the women on another."
"And what would they be doing then?"
"Building boats!"