(Grandpa) "Honey did you know that kids these days don't put their tooth under the pillow for the tooth fairy? What they do is take a digital image and upload it to the toothfairy website they then get paid in bit coins."

(Grandma) "Dear, you've been talking to your grandson again and he's pulling your leg."

(Grandpa) "Billy, why would you make up a story about the tooth fairy?"

(Grandson) "Let me get this straight... you make up a story about a fictitious character, you then tell it to my parents who perpetuate the hoax. I decided to elaborate on it and you're calling me out!"

My Granddaughter bought me one of those fancy do everything cell phones for my birthday. She said she'd come over on the weekend and show me how to use it.

The bad thing is I spilled some water on it and feeling horrible I called her up and told her what happened. She told me take out the battery, take out that card thingy dingy and put the phone in rice and leave it sealed in Tupperware over night.

I told her I'd call her back the minute I did all of that. When I called her back she asked what took to long. I told her that I do things the old fashioned way, I don't use that minute rice stuff and it took me twenty five minutes to cook the rice. She asked if I had submerged it in the rice yet and I told her that I had.

She paused for a moment and said, the rice trick doesn't always work. I'm sure it's going to work fine, I call her tomorrow after I get all of that sticky rice off of it tell her the good news.

(Grandpa) No one seems to know the value of a dollar these days!

(Grandson) That’s easy Grandpa, just look at the dollar menu.

Now that I'm a mother I'm having wild unimaginable fantasy's.

I keep picturing myself taking the evening off.

My favorite is the one about having uninterrupted sleep!