I always believed onions were the only food that could make you cry...

Until my dad hit me in the face with a coconut!

What did the monkey say after its tail got caught in the lawnmower?

Won't be long now...

I once bought a wooden car, with a wooden engine, wooden doors, wooden wheels, and wooden seats.

I then put the wooden key in the wooden ignition.

It wooden start.

A 9 year old girl has disappeared...

She disappeared after using a revolutionary new moisturizer that makes you look 10 years younger.