I found a method that I can drop an egg from 6 feet and have it not break...

Drop it from 7 feet! (It won't break those first 6 feet!)

"Could you learn to love me?" ask the young man.

"Well," sighed the young lady. "I did learn shorthand in just three months."

The foreman on a contracted job started bawling out one of the men, "I've had slow men on jobs before but you are the slowest I've ever seen. Is there anything you are quick with?"

"Well," yawned the workman, "nobody can get tired as quick as I can."

After returning from a trip overseas, my luggage did not show up in the airport baggage area. Being a frequent flyer I knew the drill and went to the lost luggage office.

I told the woman there that my bags hadn't shown up on the carousel. She smiled and told me not to worry because they were trained professionals and that I was in good hands.

"Now," she asked, "has your plane arrived yet?"