What is at the end of everything?
The letter 'G'.
Mother: "Son, finish your breakfast. It's not good to leave things undone or unfinished."
Son: "Then I will go back to sleep."
Mother: "Why?"
Son: "Because I want to finish my sleep."
A sleeping beggar puts a sign in front of him. The sign reads:
Please do not make noise by dropping coins... Use dollar bills instead.
"Whose car is this?"
"Mine! I just picked it up from the car dealer. You like it?"
"It's great, congratulations!"
"Thanks, but it's just a second hand one. Would you like to take it for a spin?"
"Really? You don't mind?"
"Not at all."
Five Minutes Later-
"What'd going on? I thought you were taking the car for a spin?
"Just give me a minute. I'm just trying to decide something."
"What?"
"Well, you said it's a second hand car, but I just can't decide which is my first hand and which is the second?"