Mary Jane: "Your husband's birthday is coming up. What are you getting him?"

Wife: "Oh, 100 of his favorite cigars."

Mary Jane: "What did you pay for them?"

Wife: "Nothing! For the last few months I have taken one or two from his box daily. He has not noticed and will be delighted with my ability in getting the kind he always smoked."

Little Johnny was playing in his yard when his next door neighbor drove by pulling a trailer. He ask what did he have in the trailer?

"Manure,"the neighbor replied.

"What are you going to do with it?" asked Little Johnny

"Put it on my strawberries," answered the farmer.

Little Johnny replied, "You ought to come and eat with us, we put ice-cream on our strawberries."

Scarecrows are always outstanding in their field...

But HAY, its in their JEANS!

Did you hear about the not so smart young lady that was injured while ice fishing?

She was run over by the zamboni.