Doctor: "Do you want to hear the good news or the bad news first?"
Patient: “Good new please!”
Doctor: “Well, we’re naming a disease after you...”
Why is girlfriend one word but best friend is two words?
Because your best friend gives you space when you need it.
My sister told me to take the spider out instead of killing him......
So we went in a bar, had a few beers, it was fun.. it turns out he was a web designer.
Why was 2019 afraid of 2020?
Because today they got into a fight and 2021...