teacher jokes

The law professor was lecturing on courtroom procedure. “When you are fighting a case and have the facts on your side, hammer away at the facts. If you have the law on your side, hammer away with the law.” “But what if you have neither the facts nor the law on your side?” “In that case,” said the professor, “hammer away on the table.”

"Yes, Theo, what is it?" asked the teacher.

"I don’t wan to alarm you, Miss Davis, but my dad said if I don't get better grades, someone was going to be in big trouble."

The teacher said; Tommy, this is the fifth day this week you’ve had to stay after school. What have you to say for yourself?
I’m certainly glad it’s Friday, said Tommy.

The teacher wrote on the blackboard, “I ain’t had no fun all summer.”
“Now Paul,” she said. “What shall I do to correct this?”
“Get a boy friend.” Paul replied.