Major Regrets I've Had In 2023:
Spending $250 on that Aaron Rogers Jets jersey.
Buying Joe Jonas and Sophie Turner an early anniversary gift.
Operating a mud bath booth at Burning Man.
Making that World Series bet on the Oakland A's.
The day after the Annual Academy Awards program had aired, my wife and I were riding on the the freeway, when she saw a digital highway information sign which read, "There's no Oscar given for being a lead-foot!"
I quickly responded, "No, but you might get 'slapped' with a ticket!"
A celebrity is someone who works hard all his life to become known...
And then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.
At what age did Chuck Norris lose his virginity?
Trick question.
Chuck Norris never loses.