Best Jokes

Pam found an old family Bible in the attic. When she opened it, a large pressed leaf fell out. “Aha!” she said, “Adam must have left his clothes here.”

Sergeant (to new recruit): What were you before you joined the army?
New Recruit: Happy, Sergeant.

“Doctor, I keep thinking I’m a goat.”

“How long have you had this feeling?”

“Ever since I was a kid.”

Doctor: I’m sorry to have to tell you that you may have rabies, and it could prove fatal.
Patient: Well, doctor, please give me pencil and paper.
Doctor: To make your will?
Patient: No, to make a list of people I want to bite.