Best Jokes

After the telephone was installed in her home, the lady called the operator.
“My telephone cord is too long,” she said. “Would you please pull it a little from your end?”

Patty met Eric and said; that’s a nice suit you are wearing.
Eric: Oh, do you like it?
Patty: Yes, who went for the fitting?

Mr. Briggs looked towards his secretary who was absorbed in painting her fingernails.
“Miss Smith,” he said, “I’d like to compliment you on your work- but when are you going to do any?”

Two convicts were sitting on their cot in a jail cell. One says to the other, "I hear you’re getting out in a few days. Tell me something are you going straight, or are you going back into politics?"