What did the hungry cow shout out to the farmer as he was walking by?
"HAAAAAY!!!!"
I saw some footage from Scotland showing the Loch Ness monster actually posting something on MySpace.
It is obviously a fraud. NO ONE uses MySpace anymore.
What do you call a bird of prey perched on a priest's pulpit?
An altar eagle.
My doctor told me that I have a condition known as narco-somnia, which has symptoms of both narcolepsy and insomnia.
That's probably why I always sleep with one eye open.