What’s the first thing a person says when they spot a UFO or Big Foot?
"Honey, do we still have that one megapixel camera?"
Why is it easy to beat zombies at poker?
They usually draw dead!
Why did the itsy-bitsy spider run up the water spout?
He heard a tech company executive was there hiring web designers.
Teacher: "Little Johnny can you tell the class what the word Pejorative means?"
Little Johnny: "Pejorative, an adjective, having a disparaging, derogatory, or belittling effect or force."
Teacher: "I'm impressed, you must have been studying."
Little Johnny: " Not really, I was channel surfing and happened to be on C-Span when the remotes battery died."