According to most studies, people’s number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death.
This means to the average person, if you go to a funeral, you're better off in the casket than doing the eulogy.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
A little old lady.
A little old lady who?
I had no idea you could yodel.
It would be embarrassing trying to explain what an appetizer is to someone from a starving country.
“Yeah, the appetizer—that’s the food we eat before we have our food. No, no, you're thinking of dessert—that’s food we have after we have our food.”
Me: Mom, you're invading my personal space.
Mom: Well, you came out of my personal space, so that makes us even.