A man was finally rescued, after having been on a deserted island for 10 years. The first question he was asked was why there were three huts on the island if he was alone.
He replied, "The first one is my home, the second is my church and the third is the church I used to attend."
As the new drivers ed student drove through the red light at the intersection, the instructor admonished him and asked, "Why did you not stop for the red light?"
The student replied, "My brother doesn't."
The instructor directed him to return to the school for more instruction before any more driving could take place. On the way back, the student approached the same intersection with a green light, he immediately slammed on the brakes shocking the instructor as well as other drivers. "Why did you stop at a green light?"
The student replied, "You never know when my brother's coming."
If Jimmie cracked corn and no one cared, then why did they write a song about it?
Teacher: Johnny what do you want to be when you grow up?
Johnny: Either an animal Vet or a Taxidermist.
Teacher: Why did you choose such different careers?
Johnny: Well, either way you get your dog back.