This past spring my church was flooded along with other places in the area. On the day back one of the Sunday School teacher decided to have a lesson on Noah and The Ark.
She asked the question: "Did you know that all the animals came on the ark in pairs?"
After some discussion, the teacher's fears were realizes as Little Johnny was waving his hand to be called on.
Little Johnny volunteered, "Teacher, all but the worms! They came on board in the apples."
Teacher: "Why are you late this morning?"
Student: "Its my alarm clock. Everyone got up except me!"
Teacher: How did the alarm clock make you the only one not to get up?"
Student: "There are eight of us in the my family and the alarm clock was only set for seven."
Little Johnny's mother was asking him a question and he replied: "Mother, you took the words right out of my ears."
Mother: "No, that's not right. It's you took the words right out of my mouth."
Little Johnny: "But I heard it before."
Customer: "How much is the hamburger steak?"
Butcher: "$1.98 cents a pound."
Customer: "But at the corner market is is only $0.98 cents a pound."
Butcher: "Then you should go there to buy it."
Customer: "But they are all out of it."
Butcher: " Oh, I see. When we don't have any we sell it for $0.50 cents a pound."