Marriage is like a deck of cards.
In the beginning, all you need is 2 hearts and a diamond.
By the end, you wish you had a club and a spade!
My friend asked me to help him with his crossword puzzle as he was struggling with 4 across.
"What's the clue?" I asked.
"Overworked postman," he said.
"How many letters?"
"Thousands!"
Tom: "If your girlfriend and your best friend were drowning, who would you save?"
Hardy: "I don't know, that's a tough one."
Tom: "Why is that?"
Hardy: "Well, what were they doing together in the first place?"
Why did the boy throw butter out the window?
Because he wanted to see a butter fly!