The other day I got carded at the liquor store. While I was taking out my ID, my old Blockbuster card fell out.
The clerk shook his head and said, “Never mind,” and rang me up.
Dude 1: Hey, bro?
Dude 2: Yeah, bro?
Dude 1: Can you pass me that pamphlet?
Dude 2: Bro-chure...
The cable repairman was on my street and asked me what time it was.
I told him it is between 1:00 pm and 4:00 pm.
I trained my dog to fetch me beer...
It may not sound too impressive, but he gets them from the neighbors fridge!