Did you hear about the new surgery kit that lets the patients sew up his own incisions?
It's called Suture Yourself.
A woman buys many gallons of milk from the milkman one day.
"Why do you need so much milk?" the mailman asks.
The lady replies, "I heard that taking baths in milk makes you healthier and prettier."
The milkman asks, "Would you like the milk pasteurized?"
She answers, "No, just up to the neck".
Why don't skeletons ever get mad?
Nothing gets under their skin.
How did the girl break up with tractor salesman?
She sent him a John Deere letter.