An aging comedian is a guest on a late night talk show.
"What do you have coming up?" the interviewer asks him.
"Mostly phlegm."
The fact that there is a highway to hell and only a stairway to heaven says a lot...
A lot about the anticipated traffic numbers.
What branch of the military accepts newborns?
The infantry.
Why did the nurse always choose the red crayon?
Because she always has to draw blood.