It is truly said that children brighten a home - they never turn the lights off.

"I don't think my mom knows much about children."
"Why do you say that?"
"Because she always puts me to bed when I am wide awake
and gets me up when I am sleepy."

One kid asks the other
Q:"How old is your grandfather?"
A:"I don't know but we've had him for a long time."

A man traveling at 130 mph on the interstate was stopped by highway police.
"Sorry, officer" said the driver, "was I driving too fast?"
"No, sir. You were flying too low."