Past Winners

In a class on abnormal psychology, the instructor was about to introduce the subject of manic depression.

The instructor asked, "How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth, screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, then sits in a chair weeping uncontrollably the next?"

A young man in the rear raised his hand and suggested earnestly, "A basketball coach?"

My wife was shopping and sent me a picture of her in a dress she was thinking of buying and asked me, “Does this dress make me look big?”

I answered back, "Noooo..."

Autocorrect changed my answer, to “Moooo...”

Please send help!

Yesterday, I saw a sign at the university that read: "The Institute of Unfinished Research has concluded that 6 out of 10 people...."

Little Johnny's mother was baking cookies one day. As she began to put a new batch in the oven, she suddenly noticed Johnny staring at the already baked cookies lying on the table.

"Johnny," she said. "Are you trying to take a cookie?"

"No," Johnny replied. "I'm trying not to."