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Favorite this joke A husband and wife had been married for 60 years and had no secrets except for one. The woman kept in her closet a shoe box that she forbade her husband from ever opening. But when she was on her deathbed - and with her blessing - he opened the box and found a crocheted doll and $60,000 in cash.
“My mother told me that the secret to a happy marriage was to never argue,” she explained. “So instead of arguing, I would keep quiet and crochet a doll.”
Her husband was touched. Only one doll was in the box, meaning that she’d been angry with him only once in 60 years. “But what about all this money?” he asked.
“Oh,” she said, “that’s the money I made from selling the dolls.”
A husband died. A few weeks later the wife died. As she got to heaven she saw her husband. She ran up to him with tears in her eyes.
"Darling, how I've missed you!"
The husband extends his arms stopping her from embracing him and says, "Whoa there woman, the contract was until death!"
The girlfriend stands by door, not sure what to say. “Honey, why is your whole upper half covered in baby oil?”
“Well, you’re always saying I never glisten,” replies the boyfriend.
“Listen! I said you never LISTEN!”
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