All my husband wanted was to pay for some batteries, but none of the clerks in the electronics store seemed interested in helping him.
"I've got an idea," I said and pulled a tape measure out of my purse. I stepped over to one of the giant plasma-screen TVs and started to measure it.
Faster than you can say high definition, a young man came running over. "May I help you?" he asked breathlessly.
"Yes," I said. "I'd like to buy these batteries."
I was the best door-to-door security alarms salesman for several years running.
The trick was to level a brochure on the kitchen table if there was nobody home.
How many letters are in the Christmas alphabet?
25... there's no 'L'...
An older couple were making their funeral arrangements. The cemetery salesman pointed out a plot that he thought they would like. "You will have a beautiful view of the swan pond," he assured them.
The husband didn't buy it, he replied, "Unless you will be including a periscope with my casket, I do not think I will enjoy it."