Latest Jokes

A woman stopped at a historic old hotel and asked the desk clerk for the room rates. “A room on the first floor is none hundred and fifty dollars; on the second floor, one hundred and forty dollars, and on the third floor, one hundred and thirty dollars.”
The woman turned to leave. “Don’t you like the accommodations?” asked the clerk.
“Oh, yes, it’s great,” replied the woman. “It just isn’t tall enough.”

A Policeman came to my door yesterday and asked, “Where were you between four and six?” So I said, "Probably in kindergarten or first grade.”

The CEO of a major corporation asked his press officer to write a twenty-minute speech for the shareholders meeting. Upon his return from the meeting he is furious at the press officer.

“Are you trying to kill my career?” the executive barks. "I asked for a twenty-minute speech and you give me an hour-long speech! People were standing up and walking out.”

“No,” says the press officer, “I gave you exactly what you requested… a twenty-minute speech and two extra copies.”

A famous doctor was being interviewed the news media. Looking to spice things up a little, one reporter asked if the doctor had ever made any serious mistakes.
“Well, yes,” the doctor sighed. “I once cured a multimillionaire.”
“How was that a mistake? The reporter asked.
The doctor shook his head wearily. “I did it in one visit!”