"Well, I finaly retired my old car", said the old man. His pal ask, "Did you junk it or trade it in?" "Naw nothing like that, I put four new Michelins on it."
Q: Why do birds hold one of their legs up when sleeping?
A: Because if they hold both their legs up, they'll fall.
Q: Do politicians ever lie?
A: What do you think they get paid for?
A couple had a fight after which the wife started packing her belongings. Her husband asked her, 'where are you packing to?' She answered, 'I'm going to my mother.' After a while, the man started packing too. She asked, 'what are you doing, where are you going?' He answered, 'I'm going to my mother'. She asked, 'what happens to the 6 children then? Her husband answered, 'you're going to your mother, I'm going to my mother, and the children will also have to go to their mother!!'