A man had a nose ring fitted into his nose.
A friend asked, "How much did you pay for that?"
"I paid through the nose!” he replied.
I saw a sign that said "Speed Bumps".
I thought, my how times change! Speed used to kill.
A store manager overheard one of his salesmen talking to a customer.
"No sir,"said the salesman.” We haven't had any for awhile and it doesn't look like we'll be getting any soon."
The manager was horrified and yelled after the departing customer,” Come back next week. We’re sure to have whatever it is you need."
Irate, he turned to his salesman,” Never tell a customer we're out of anything! NOW, WHAT DID HE WANT?"
"Rain,” answered the salesman.
Little Emily was complaining to her mother that her stomach hurt. Her mother replied, “That’s because it's empty. Maybe you should try putting something in it." The next day, the pastor was over at Emily's family's house for lunch. He mentioned having his head hurt, to which Emily immediately replied, "That's because it's empty. Maybe you should try putting something in it."