Latest Jokes

A fish walks into a bar, the bartender asks,
"What would you like?" the fish says holding his neck,
"Water".

A little girl was eating a doughnut on her way to church. Since she could not eat inside, she left it outside and she prayed, "God, will you please watch my doughnut and not go anywhere else? Thank you!"

Then she went inside. When the priest said, "God is here, God is there, and God is everywhere!"

The little girl said, ”You are wrong! God is outside watching my doughnut!"

One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her son into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor in his voice, "Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?"

The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. "I can't dear," she said. "I have to sleep in daddy's room."

A long silence was broken at last by his shaky little voice: "The big sissy."

His father sends a small boy to bed. Five
minutes later....
"Da-ad...."
"What?" "I'm thirsty. Can you bring drink of water?" "No. You had your
chance. Lights out."
Five minutes later: "Da-aaaad....."
"WHAT?"
"I'm THIRSTY. Can I have a drink of water??"
"I told you NO!" If you ask again, I'll have to spank you!!"
Five minutes later......"Daaaa-aaaad....."
"WHAT!"
"When you come in to spank me, can you bring a drink of water?"