Latest Jokes

I asked the three-year-old what he likes to eat.

“Nuts,” he replied.

“Great,” I said. “What kind, pecans? Walnuts? Peanuts?"

“No,” she said with a smile, “donuts!”

A fellow was sitting in the doctor's waiting room, and said to himself every so often, "Lord I hope I'm sick."

After about the 5th or 6th time, the receptionist couldn't stand it any longer and asked, "Why in the world would you want to be sick Mr. Adams?"

The man replied, "I'd hate to be well and feel like this."

Many students across the nation are doing school assignments on their computers from home these days.

Father: Jimmy, you need to go online and do your homework. It’s important to prepare yourself for the profession of choice.

Later on the father checks on Jimmy’s progress only to find him playing video games.

Father: Jimmy, you’re supposed to be doing your homework.

Jimmy: I am doing my homework dad, I’m going to be a video game reviewer on YouTube.