Billy: That's not true, who told you that Bobby?
Bobby: A little bird told me.
Billy: Who was it, was it Daffy Duck?
Two guys were sitting at the bar. One of them said, “A lady has invited me to brunch tomorrow but I know nothing of proper table etiquette."
“What do you want to know?" asked the other one.
“Well, um… for example what goes better with waffles, red or white wine?”
"Is it too late to cancel?"
Grandpa: They say a man’s car is a reflection of himself.
Granddaughter: I see what you mean Grandpa; sometimes your car doesn’t want to start in the morning, and when it does start it sputters and back fires before it gets going.
Grandpa: Hey…
How do you know if you have inner beauty?
Just ask a radiologist.