Q: How do you get a family photo taken if you can't afford to buy one?
A: Sit the family in the front seat and run a red light.
Q: What do you have if you hold 13 tennis balls in one hand and 15 tennis balls in the other hand?
A: REALLY big hands!
Q: Why were the Cocoa Puffs so afraid of their owner?
A: They heard that he was a cereal killer.
Two men (a Russian and an American) were talking about their countries' accomplishments.
The Russian says, "We were the first to go into Space."
The American replies, "Well, we were the first to land on the moon."
Sick of their arrogance, another man comes over and says, "Oh yeah! Well, I'm gonna be the first one on the Sun!"
The Russian and American both laugh saying, "You can't go to the Sun. It's too hot. You'll burn up"
The man confidently replies, "I'm not an idiot. I'll just go at night!"