Outside a second-hand shop:

WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - Bicycles, Washing Machines, etc... Why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain!

You know you're having a bad day when...

Your wife says, "Good morning, Bill" and your name is George.

You know you're having a bad day when...

Your pet rock snaps at you.

My wife sat down next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked, "What's on TV?"

I answered, "Dust."

And then the fight started.