Q: Why did the farmer get a Nobel Prize?

A: He was out-standing in his field!

The doctor told the idiot to take this medicine after a hot bath.
He could hardly finish drinking the bath!

Judge: Haven’t I seen you before?
Man: Yes, Your Honor. I taught your daughter how to play the drums.
Judge: Twenty years!

A man entered a barbershop and said: “I am tired of looking like everyone else!
I want a change! Part my hair from ear to ear!”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes!” said the man.
The barber did as he was told, and a satisfied customer left the shop.
A few hours passed and the man reentered the shop. “Put it back the way it was,” he said. “What’s the matter? Asked the barber. “Are you tired of being a nonconformist already?” “No”, he replied, “I am tired of people whispering in my nose!”