Called to the scene of a magnificent celestial display, the professor watched as a bright object dashed through the skies over New Mexico.

When he returned to his observatory, reporters asked him if what he had seen was really a UFO.

Looking them straight in the eye, the impassive scientist replied, “No comet.”

After years in the work force, someone finally concluded that an employer is someone who’s late when you’re early and early when you’re late.

This administration has conclusively discovered how to deal wit the deficit.
It’s a skill, which requires addition and distraction.

A down and out musician was playing his harmonica in the middle of a busy shopping mall. Striding over, a policeman asked, “May I please see your permit?” I don’t have one,” confessed the musician. “In that case, you’ll have to accompany me.”
“Splendid!” exclaimed the musician. “What shall we sing?”