Don had just returned from two weeks of vacation. He asked his boss for two more weeks off to get married.
“What!” shouted the boss. “I can’t give you more time now. Whey didn’t you get married while you were off?”
“Are you nuts?” replied Don. “That would have ruined my entire vacation!”

A man visiting a graveyard saw a tombstone that read: “Here lies John Smith, a lawyer and an honest man.”
“How about that!” he exclaimed. “They’ve got three people buried in one grave.”

Overheard at the track: “Horse racing is very romantic. The horse hugs the rail, the jockey puts his arms around the horse, and you kiss your money good-by.”

Having completed a course of analysis with his psychiatrist, John tells a friend:
“I always thought I was indecisive”
Friend: “And now?”
John: “I’m not so sure.”