bar & drinking jokes
Favorite this joke A man walks into a bar and orders the latest, seasonal beer.
He takes one gulp and nearly chokes. “This beer goes down like sandpaper!” he yells.
“Of course,” replies the bartender, “it’s only a rough draft.”
Two guys sitting at the bar were talking.
The first one said, "Last week when I left here a car pulled out in front of me and caused an accident but the officer took me to jail."
The other guy at the bar replied, "That's too bad you were blamed. I think some cops are bias if you've been drinking. Let me see that ticket."
The first guy handed it over. The other guy looked it over and said, "Wow, this cop very bias and he's lying too... he's claiming you hit a parked car."
Waiter: I see your glass is empty, would you like another one?
My Dad: Why would I want two empty glasses?
A barhopping fellow, four sheets to the wind, stumbles into a bar and declares "I'm buying everyone in the bar a drink! Line 'em up, bartender!"
So the bartender pours everyone a drink, and frivolity commences until the bartender says to that first guy, "OK, that'll be $210."
The drunk guy says, "I don't have that kind of money!"
The bartender throws him out. A few minutes later, the drunk staggers back into the bar. This time he says, "I'm buying everyone in this bar a drink! Except for you bartender, when you drink, you get nasty."
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