misc jokes
Favorite this joke For once, instead of the ridiculous statement, "Please note our menu options have changed..."
How about, "Our menu options are the same as they have been for years. Just prepare to be on hold for a very long time..."
While my parents were making their funeral arrangements, the cemetery salesman pointed out a plot that he thought they would like. “You’ll have a beautiful view of the swan pond,” he assured them.
Dad wasn’t sold. Without missing a beat he told the salesman, “Unless you’re including a periscope with my casket, I don’t know how I’m going to enjoy that.”
On her way back from the concession stand, Sandra asked the man at the end of the row, "Sir, did I step on your foot a minute ago?"
Expecting an apology the man said, "Indeed you did."
Sandra nodded, "Oh, good. Then this is my row."
I was walking down the road and saw my neighbor standing on his fifth floor apartment balcony shaking a carpet.
I shouted up to him, “What’s wrong?"
He replied, "It won’t start!”
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